Terms
It is comedy. It is not advice. Here is the rest.
FullyCooked reads the brokerage data you connect and writes a roast of it. Nothing here is financial, investment, tax or legal advice, and nothing here is a statement of fact about you or your money. By using FullyCooked you agree to these terms. If you do not, do not use it.
Who can use it
You must be 18 or older and able to enter a binding agreement. Connect only accounts you hold or are authorized to access.
What the service is
FullyCooked connects to your brokerage through SnapTrade, reads a snapshot of the accounts you pick, once, writes a short roast with an AI model, and gives you a card to share. The connection is read-only. We cannot trade, transfer or change anything. Your use of SnapTrade is subject to SnapTrade’s own terms.
Not advice
The roast is satire written by a machine. It may be inaccurate, incomplete, out of date, unfair or plain wrong. The figures come from your brokerage through SnapTrade and may be delayed or incorrect. Make no financial decision because of anything on this site. For advice, talk to a licensed professional.
Your data
How we handle your data is in the privacy policy, which is part of these terms. In short: brokerage data is deleted the moment the roast is written; the roast is kept so your link works.
Sharing
You decide whether to share. Anyone with the link can view the card and react, and a shared roast may appear on our home page as the example. You are responsible for where you post it. We may remove any roast at any time, for any reason.
Acceptable use
Do not try to reach roasts, data or accounts that are not yours. Do not scrape, automate, overload, probe or interfere with the service. Do not use it for anything unlawful. We may block anyone who does.
Ownership
The site, its design and its code are ours. The roast about your accounts is yours to share and reproduce as you like; you also let us show it at its link and, if you shared it, on our home page.
No warranty
THE SERVICE IS PROVIDED “AS IS” AND “AS AVAILABLE”, WITHOUT WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, ACCURACY, AVAILABILITY AND NON-INFRINGEMENT. WE DO NOT WARRANT THAT THE SERVICE WILL BE UNINTERRUPTED, ERROR-FREE OR SECURE, OR THAT ANY ROAST WILL BE ACCURATE, APPROPRIATE OR FUNNY.
Limitation of liability
TO THE FULLEST EXTENT PERMITTED BY LAW, FULLYCOOKED AND THE PEOPLE WHO BUILD AND RUN IT ARE NOT LIABLE FOR ANY INDIRECT, INCIDENTAL, SPECIAL, CONSEQUENTIAL, EXEMPLARY OR PUNITIVE DAMAGES, OR FOR ANY LOSS OF PROFITS, DATA, INVESTMENTS, REPUTATION OR GOODWILL, ARISING FROM OR RELATED TO THE SERVICE OR ANY ROAST, UNDER ANY THEORY OF LIABILITY, EVEN IF WE WERE TOLD IT COULD HAPPEN.
OUR TOTAL LIABILITY FOR ANY CLAIM RELATED TO THE SERVICE IS LIMITED TO THE AMOUNT YOU PAID US TO USE IT, WHICH IS NOTHING.
Where the law does not allow a limitation, our liability is limited to the smallest amount it allows.
Indemnity
You will defend and hold harmless FullyCooked and the people who build and run it from any claim, loss or expense, including reasonable legal fees, arising from your use of the service, anything you share, or your breach of these terms.
Changes and shutdown
We may change or discontinue the service, or any part of it, at any time and without notice. We may update these terms; the date at the top says when. Using the service after a change means you accept the new terms.
Governing law
These terms are governed by the laws of the Province of Ontario and the federal laws of Canada that apply there. Disputes go to the courts of Toronto, Ontario, and you consent to their jurisdiction.
The rest
If any part of these terms cannot be enforced, the rest still applies. Not enforcing a term is not a waiver. These terms and the privacy policy are the entire agreement about the service. You may not assign them; we may.